landscapes

i took the train back up from new york city yesterday, and was spoiled with stunning window-seat views of new england in the fall.

the robust reds and pumpkin oranges are already emerging - the air looks crisper, the colours sharper. what is it about autumn that makes it so pleasing? surely not just the visual aesthetics. or is it something specific to the new england landscape? i've been trying to figure out what exactly i love so much about it, for the english landscape does not inspire such affection. the english landscape is barer - its beauty measured in the greenness of the grass, the regularity of the fields, the way in which mild sunlight falls and frames a quiet pastoral picture. the american landscape is varied, dramatically changing its colours with the seasons, presenting greater slopes and valleys, and glittering, deep blue lakes and sea coasts. english waters are never that striking; its colours and motions are muted.

where the american landscape is beautiful on a grand scale, the english landscape is beautiful only to those with eyes keen enough to discern variance, an unexpected lilac shrub in one corner, a soft bundle of sheep in another. where one sings, proclaiming its vastness and health, the other waits quietly for you to inscribe in its name a private ode, a few lines of sentiment.

as sentimental as i may be, i appreciate the new england landscape which takes me out of myself - it takes my hand and says, "look here! look at the atlantic coast, look at these forests and my riches!" whereas the english landscape prompts me to converse with myself - with my memories of sweet and of dark days. and so i guess even after comparing the two i still favour the new england landscape; it makes me want to stay in america for a few years more so that i can better get to know it, and explore it.

life is a beautiful thing

i need to stop complaining.
sore throat? fever? minor ailments that will be done away with adequate rest, gallons of water, vitamins, optimism.
lots of homework and deadlines? that's what it means to be a student, silly. you'll be pining for them, the good ol' days of midterms and papers, in x years' time.
grad school applications and ridiculous standardized tests? hey at least you have the potential (financial and academic) to apply. it's a privilege, not something to whine about.
other stressful situations? that's life :)

so as usual in a sheila-like post, the moral of the story is to be happy. (ah, how original. but i never claimed that my blog was to be of interesting or even good writing.)

what's a few stressful weeks, in a lifetime? if one can get through tripos, one can get through ANYTHING!

what i need right now is a cup of hot milk tea. and a massage. but these are things best found in england, perhaps... ;)

an update before the semester whooshes over me

for the most part i have slipped back quietly into life here and i am happy that the transition has been pretty seamless, drama-less. i love being near pembroke campus, with the Vdub, cvs, and restaurants all seconds away. the house is comfortable and home-like with its stripey cushions and skylight. i love all of my housemates and am growing increasingly fond of the boys. my room is nice - i think my things clash somewhat with the furniture that came with the room (black desk, bookcase and chest of drawers) but it's okay: we adapt and make do with what we have.

i have resolved to be frugal this year, which is why my 8 summer/autumn tops shall suffice. (my mom sent over 2 more so that means that i will not have to exhibit a day-of-the-week rotation of shirts :P) it is really time to start appreciating the value of things and this includes the value of money... so here's to no more new clothes until it is imperative to buy warmer winter things!

classes are interesting but not terribly exciting. i am being pragmatic this semester and finishing up concentration courses. so, two seminars - one on Ovid and the Metamorphoses, the other on Milton's shorter poems. advanced japanese. children's thinking with the cogsci department. i find that Brown students often try to wear their courses on their sleeve and are often secretly proud of how funky or interdisciplinary their courses are. i guess i'm sticking with my comfort zone this semester - hopefully i can do something braver in the spring :).

i guess senior year for me is characterized by a "i don't give a damn what other people think". i just want to do what is right for myself and for my loved ones, and be happy and enjoy the year. oh and get into grad school or find a job. (the GREs are nightmares. i cracked open the practice booklet for lit today and was horrified to find that they ask identification questions on characters, authors, dates, works. studying for it will be exponentially harder than for the SATs.)

anyway, life as a college student is just amazing :). even though i sometimes catch myself counting down to the holidays, i know deep down that i want to savour this year, slowly, with heart, mind and eyes wide open - well, maybe eyes closed, for the more tender moments.

不得不爱

希望自己可以認識點樣獨立。。。

providence, rhode island

i'm here!
jetlagged, and too lazy to get started on cleaning and decorating my new room.

i feel really apprehensive about this new semester but i hope that being mad-busy will keep me sane and happy. the occasional pangs of home/love-sickness will hopefully fade with time. as with last year, i just have to stop comparing the two universities and just focus on what i am blessed with right here.

on classes... i'm disappointed that japanese and latin conflict. and that english and the introduction to education class do, too. :( so i might end up taking english, italian, japanese and a course on children's thinking. this whole liberal arts approach is quite refreshing, but i will miss prac crit, one-on-one supervisions, and the english bunch a lot.