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what i hate about life is that no matter how much you hold onto a certain world, it will inevitably shift due to some thing and thereafter take on different shades of meaning and feeling. maybe that's supposed to render us more resourceful, strong beings. events are viewed through their effects..the lessons and realisations. but all this only comes after slugging your way through that in between period when what was before and what is now is so different - and i still don't know what i really think. nor does anyone it seems. it's just a whole bunch of awful silence and attempts to string together thoughts that are only half forming.

down with sheila-like sensibility

it's strange finding myself with this blog, wondering what i should write. conversations with ritz about public blogs crop up perennially - this time i decided to just do it, even though we've always agreed that blogs are complex things. for one, i hate the idea of being judged by what or how i write (might as well 'fess up now: i'm a crappy writer when it comes to anything other than english essays, lacking the eloquence of my counterparts). and the idea of conveying private thoughts in an incredibly public medium freaks me out a little. but if i don't have the guts to post entries read only by friends and acquaintances, then i might as well forget about pursuing a career in publishing or teaching.

i say this as disclaimer to what i'm about to do now, and that is, talk about something i've wanted to discuss with others but was unable to for fear of boring them. it concerns an obsession with mine which most people don't understand. not the obesssion part; the sheila-actually-obsesses-over-things? part.

...Christian Bale! recently rewatched Little Women for the nth time, and all the wonderful scenes have just been replaying in my mind these past few days. truth...Little Women was one of my favourite books as a 10-year old; i used to address all my diary entries with 'Dear Beth' because Beth is the sweetest and gentlest of the March sisters. :)

so for the fun of it, here's a list of Bale movies i've seen and want to see. you will be surprised at some of the titles...and have probably watched him in quite a few without realizing it!

checked off
- 'Empire of the Sun': he was only 13 when he took on the starring role as an English boy separated from his parents in Shanghai, the day the Japanese invaded (1937? ahh my chinese history is rusty.) bale's performance was so amazing a movie academy created a whole new award for him - best juvenile performance.

- 'Pocahontas': yes the disney movie! ahh bet you didn't know that he voiced Thomas' character (the guy who gets arrowed by the native americans by the river)

- 'The New World': those who can appreciate or at least tolerate slow, achingly beautiful scenes with zero dialogue should watch this...it's a modern re-enactment of the Pocahontas story. coincidentally, it also stars Colin Farrell who i used to obsess over 4 years ago hahaha

- 'Little Women': :)

- 'Equilibrium': a cult video classic amongst some guys, it is apparently often shoplifted from video rental places cuz there were limited copies produced! having said that, i hated this movie. it was like a really bad version of the Matrix with a lot of guns, solemn guys in black suits and pseudo religion/science vs morality stuff.

- 'The Prestige': Bale was good, but i liked the other magician-flick 'The Illusionist' with Edward Norton more

- 'Howl's Moving Castle': you HAVE to see this animation movie by Ghibli Studio if you haven't already! same director as Totoro, Spirited Away, etc.

- 'Batman Begins': one of my favourites :) but i still like the older Michael Keaton batman movies

to-be-checked-off
- 'The Portrait of A Lady': couldn't believe he was in this movie!! those who knew me well during the IB years probably remember me carrying around this book by Henry James (THE master of novel-writing...you must read 'The Turn of the Screw' or 'Washington Square'). it was cuz i wrote my extended essay on this book! it's just too bad there isn't a rental copy in Singapore :(

- 'Harsh Times': Bale plays some deranged American soldier who returns from the Gulf War. the trailer was... .... intense stuff.

- 'The Dark Knight': batman sequel! summer 2008

- '3:10 to Yuma': the title refers to a train bound for Yuma. Christian Bale is a ranch owner who volunteers to hold, then escort an outlaw (Russel Crowe) to his hearing in Yuma. okay so i've never even seen a Western, but the whole Bale/Crowe conflict in the story seems pretty intriguing. see the trailer at: http://www.310toyumathefilm.com/ it releases on sep 7th - so soon!!

sorry...i've bombarded you all long enough :D. i'll try posting something less self indulged next time. if this has piqued your interest in the actor, then yay i'm glad :)

summer 2007: hong kong and japan segments!

interning at DBS
a humbling experience :). having to go in there knowing nothing about finance...do a crappy chinese translation of my powerpoint presentation...mess up pitchbook binding (the pages fell out half an hour before a big meeting between our corporate banking team and the client)...oh and one moment i'll never forget - accidentally disconnecting THE boss who was on long-distance call from the singapore hq. muakaka! (in hindsight the stitchy side of me can appreciate this, but at the time it was a tad bit humiliating.) these things really made realize how getting As in school kinda means nothing in the corporate arena.

then there was the research+ powerpoints + elf-ish duties of rushing stuff for my co-workers who, poor things, had tens of conference calls daily and many pending presentations all at once.

but i can't stray too far from the typical internship story and say it wasn't worth it. the team was genuinely nice (and so smart in a down-to-earth way) and i made some friends :D. and even a pathetic number-cruncher like me finally figured out how to handle corporate financials. although i admit that many mornings i was glum about work, it's just something i had to try out. if anything, it's kinda like an immunity card for times when my dad plays the whole you-should-consider-a-respectable-career-like-banking hint.


hello hokkaido!
onto happier memories! so after 6 weeks of work (made bearable mostly by getting to see a bunch of hk visitors: risa, cinnie, lanxiu and childhood japan friends larry and fred) i was rewarded with a lovely time in japan. some snapshots of our little adventures on the southern coast of hokkaido...

day 1: driving from the airpot in Chitose to our ryokan (traditional inn with tatami rooms and onsen - hot public baths) for the night. as you can see, stitch earnestly served as our navigation assistant while my brother and i just took photos.












left: mom happy about dinner
right: and with good reason - here was our menu (we were served everything on it! though many were tiny sculptures of pickled vegetables and seafood)

day 2: Muroran
breakfast! and then more driving along the scenic coast. i like the lighthouse picture with the sea of japan.











the rest of the day was spent driving southwards along Hokkaido's coast down to Hakodate. along the way, we raided some supermarkets for japanese snacks, which proved immensely popular for the car rides :D

day 3 and 4: Hakodate
Hakodate was one of those treaty ports opened by the americans in 1854. port implies sea which implies....seafood!

early morning excursion to the seafood market - lots of kani (crab) and ika (squid).











eating grilled crab at a market vendor // michael and me at the pier












the star-shaped park in Hakodate, complete with a quaint moat and viewing tower! and us up on the tower











Afternoon, Dusk and Evening Views from Mt. Hakodate
going up the cable car ropeway at 5:30. then the afternoon view at 5:45ish? not that many people there yet...6:15 the lights slowly flicker on! and night view at 7:15

left: the open sea during sunset

our Hakodate visit coincided with their annual street dance festival, which was fun to witness. i regret not taking pictures of the hordes of people dancing behind the parade trucks and buses (though i do have a video of a flock of people jumping up and down and dancing to the organisers "IKKA, IKKA, IKKA, IKKA!!!" i think it means dance...not quite sure but i should really know this huh. help, risa?

days 5, 6, 7: Sapporo and Otaru

so the rest of the trip was spent in Sapporo. we did a little sightseeing at the old government building, Sapporo TV tower, some parks but generally our stay consisted of a lot of eating (tonkatsu - fried pork cutlets served with rice, soup and shredded cabbage, japanese hamburger steaks, udon, ramen, sashimi, more crab, yakitori YUMM) and shopping.

me and my wonderful parents and brother...:) a lot of our late evenings in the hotel were spent doing Sudoku challenges, puzzle challenges and card games hahaha. we're a very competitive lot. (or at least within the family setting)

left: parents and the sapporo tv tower (nothing special i think, but it's a nice pic)

below: another dinner revolving around crab...hairy crab, long-legged crab, err plain crab. and me standing in front of a hot foot-bath site where people get to soak their weary feet

Otaru - another coastal town famous for glass warehouses and the small canel you see in the below pic. a very touristy place though. the vanilla yoghurt ice-cream there was amazing though.

naturally i have to leave you with a glimpse of stitch! okay prior to this japan trip, i considered myself to be a pretty hard-core stitch lover. but the Japanese seem even more smitten with stitch - he is everywhere! in every marketable form too! i went to small town supermarkets and he was there grinning like the hawaiian imp that he is, on 100 yen cups, chopsticks, fans, cushions, hair accessories (little stitch heads clasped to hair bands), towels, bags, stationery and this was just in the suburban areas of southern hokkaido. in the city, stitch is visibly popular than mickey mouse or any other disney character. so i'm not crazy after all teehee.

and now home in singapore again. technically i wasn't away for that long, but it felt like it. (can't imagine having to stay at Brown for most of the summer...!) it's strange cuz even in hk i sometimes feel very out of place despite having lived there for 8 years. can't quite pinpoint the reasons for this; perhaps it's just the constant rush of city and working life and all the fuss on appearances which gets to me sometimes. singapore really is, as one of my coworkers and friends commented, more casual. this isn't a moral statement; singapore is just a little more laid back and i guess this is good for comfyness-loving people like me.